Suntanning

_____________________________________________________________________ Today, as I write this – I am a major contributor to global warming, and will be for probably the next few days.

I've recently begun sun tanning again. I've been going for almost a month now once or twice a week in a very low UV bed. So there haven't been dramatic results, per say - but I like the slow and steady approach to this particular habit. To mark my progress, I keep sticking a little butterfly sticker on my skin which will show up lighter as the rest of my skin gets darker and darker. As of yesterday morning, there was no butterfly to be seen.

So yesterday I go in to see if my bed was open. It wasn't, but the helpful employee said that bed 2 was. It was a step up from what I was already using, but it had less intense something-or-other which dramatically reduced the chances of sunburn. It was, he told me in a matter-of-fact-voice, the bed that I should have started with. Splendid! Put me in for 10 minutes like the other bed! He paused, "Well, you could go longer in this bed, it won't burn you, and you’ll see results very quickly.” "Hmmm, ok, let's do 15 minutes then." He had a point, I had been at 10 minutes for 2 1/2 weeks now, surely 15 minutes in a lesser bed would do no harm. Perhaps that butterfly I'd been sticking to my skin would begin to show!

I go in, and cover my face, like always, and relax. There is something nice about laying on a warm tanning bed when its chilly outside, I just love it. I did get a little warm, but turned the fan up to compensate, and was fine. After 15 minutes were over, I went home to take a shower and then finish up some studying before class started later on that evening.

I looked at myself in the mirror to see how the tanning was progressing, and was a little worried to see the vast amounts of pink beginning to show all across my hide. I changed my plan to a milk bath to take some of the heat out of the ‘mild’ burn, and then went to class. When I returned home at nine, I changed into my pajamas, and noticed that I was putting off vast amounts of radiant heat. I went back to the bathroom mirror, where it was revealed to me that I now resembled a lobster. The good news was that my butterfly sticker showed. A pale outline among a vast expanse of red. The bad news was that tomorrow was going to involve much pain.

Today, I am the sun, clothed in baggy jeans and a loose shirt. I can barely carry my laptop bag, and last night Greg couldn’t sleep near to me for the amount of radiant heat that was warming our bed. My cats are especially drawn to me, as it must resemble sleeping on a heater, and I know that the global warming monitors will notice a sharp peak in Colorado for the next few days.